Frustrated at St. Andrews, Tiger hands in card in Roman Numerals

St. Andrews - Frustrated by his recent play, Tiger Woods set out to record all of his shots in Roman Numerals. Tournament officials questioned his lack of etiquette. "This is an affront to the sport of golf," said tournament official Eddie Reynolds, "No one here knows how to read, write, or speak Roman."

The fallen icon's antics didn't stop there. Just to be contentious, he also handed in those numbers on a scorecard signed by Jack Nicklaus that he picked up at an auction.

In another incident, to protect himself from censure (or censor, I suppose), he shouted profanities at a rustling crowd in Icelandic, a language he has never spoken but learned the prior night after ordering Rosetta Stone on the Home Shopping Network. He was also seen throwing live balls into sand traps, giggling like a child.

Bobby Jones once used the Dewey decimal system to record his scores, but that was after he suffered a blow to the head with a 5 iron. But that's another story.

When questioned at the press conference Tiger had this say: "Well, it was hot out there. I've been to...where are we, England, Barcelona. . .well, wherever I am, I've been here many times, and it was hot out there. Actually it really probably more the humidity than the heat. So it got to me. The heat, the humidity, the atmospheric pressure. Blame it on the weather. I most certainly do. You know, I'm not really sure I ever really liked golf anyway."

Incidentally, Woods went XVII over par.